gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Randomize
