hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
