I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.