The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
