If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
be right there i have to get my cape
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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