Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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