turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
So many bounce houses so little time
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Randomize