I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
