you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Ladies don't puke and tell
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Randomize
