I'm eating all of the evidence.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
