My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Randomize
