If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
