our cab driver is having phone sex.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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