He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
we're making bets on your personal life
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Randomize
