So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
this just has baby written all over it
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
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