Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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