And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Randomize