DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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