I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
