Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
