tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
