Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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