hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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