I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize