Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
third nipple confirmed
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
