After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
