hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
