its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
