i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
