Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Randomize
