it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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