Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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