I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Even my vagina gasped.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
