We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
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