look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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