How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
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