Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Randomize