I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
