There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
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