You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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