i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
