how can u be prego again
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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