I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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