Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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