hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.