we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
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