Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
You just made me feel so damn special
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Randomize
