big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
