I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
