gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize