my soul wont recognize me after tonight
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I can't turn off my feet"
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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