I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
i would punch a child for taco bell
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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