if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize